I’m On A High

I do drugs. Hell, yeah, I love it.

This is my fourth day taking Reductil. It promises weak appetite - plus nausea, excessive perspiration and farting. It was just recommended by a friend who told me that you can see the effects in one week. Yeah, I lost my appetite and all, but I can't still see the stray hairs down there. My tummy is still gargantuan and I am beginning to lose hope. Andrei is on 15-mg. regimen while I'm on 10-mg. The intake is once a day, of course after a meal. It's his second week and his man boobs are a bit smaller now. Aside from palpitation every now and then, I still feel fat. Good thing, a friend told me that my figure is beginning to be visible again sans the watermelon-ish, frontal, monstrous kargada I have. I miss my old, sexy self.

I lost a tremendous amount of confidence because of being fat. Last year, my waistline was a 25-incher (high school: 22", college: 24"). November 2006, I told Drei of my plan to get fat. Right timing, Christmas season. I gained a lot of pounds then and I was happy about it. My measurement read 31" after two weeks of weight gaining. I was a tabachingching.

I didn't really care because I know I can shred the fearful plump in days but I forgot one important thing: my metabolism was slow due to laziness. I forgot what a gym looks like. I was good in bed - I can sleep for days (Thanks to Manong Julian's shirt). Intimacy was also a dilemma since I cannot carry my own weight. W.O.T. was a scare to me most especially if Drei would ask for it. I would just pretend to be tired because of doing nothing (I was unemployed during those days).

January. I looked like a pregnant woman for the 7th time. I didn't care about fashion and shit every time I go to work. I would borrow Drei's shirts because my blouses wouldn't fit anymore. The last time I checked the measurement? 33.5".

July. I began to feel more insecure and paranoid. A few days before our anniversary, Andrei and I had a huge fight and it was not a normal fight. I hurt him. That's when I realized that I was the problem : I slapped his face and broke his eyeglasses. Heavy.

During the last week of July, Andrei told me that he's on his second day of the Reductil suicide crap. Man, for an Ilocana like me, the drug is expensive! He said he bought it for 100++ bucks per capsule and he bought 7. I was thinking twice. But it seemed like the whole world was looking at me, waiting for me to decide: is she gonna do it or not?

Before Drei and I went to watch Ratatouille, we dropped by a drugstore. He said he will be buying 10 capsules. I was still hesitant. The line was short - here goes nothing.

"Reductil. 10 milligrams."

"Ilan po ma'am?"

"Seven. How much?"

"600+++++++ ma'am."

Then everything went black. I opened my eyes and saw a rat trying to cook. Okay, I was still able to watch the movie. God! Gaining weight does not cost that much as long as you eat anything you see. But losing weight? Man, it's damn hard.

Now, I am facing my computer and another challenge in my life: reduce my beer belly to at least 27" before August 18 (Team Building) or swim like the old Judy Ann Santos wearing long sleeves and a saya. Obviously, I chose the first.

Fitrum intake still needs exercise. For people who have the same dilemma, ask your doctor if you can use Reductil. If you want to go to the gym, do it perpetually and DON'T EAT HEAVY MEALS AFTER! Muster discipline. For people who are happy with their weight, I admire you. Just stay happy. For physically-blessed individuals, good for you, yun lang. I don't want to add a feather on your crap, errr, cap.

I still love eating, but I only eat a fourth of my usual intake. I realized that when I was in High School and College, I was very busy doing a lot of things: sports, academic works, boozescapades. I would join my guy friends on luncheons and would eat more than what they feasted. Flashbacks. I hate them.

Oh well, c'est la vie.  To each his own. I can't wait to check my weight after a week or so. For the mean time, I am still Mrs. Norbit.